Naturally bad

 I recently finished reading a fantastic book. Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl. 

What a beautiful, inspiring and wise young girl she had become! Especially the last third of the book shows her true wisdom. She often deals with matters like war, racial issues, feminism... I completely agree with everything Anne has to say and I am astonished; my blood literally stops at the thought of the wisdom this young girl possessed. Things, which we were able to comprehend only after a life time of experience, she grasped at a very young age, so easily, so progressively.

The 'best' job ever

I am a bra fitter.
And it's not such a cool job as everyone thinks. Especially guys. Whenever I say what I do for living, their first responses are (in this order): 1. jaw dropped 2. woooow 3. “So you get to touch boobs everyday? Cool!” .

If the roles were reversed

Nothing major have happened to me today, but even being squeezed on my butt in the middle of the day , in a very safe touristic city by a middle class, smart looking young Indian, makes you wonder where this fucking world is going into. I got scared. I didn't do anything wrong, I refuse to be punished just for the fact that I am a woman. Oh yes, I forgot- we are just supposed to sit in the house and take care of our family. Do not even go out, cover yourself; also the eyes so you couldn't even see, maybe that would be the solution. Or I got another solution. Let's castrate all the men, kill them off, we don't need them. Why do I need to suffer just because I have a pussy. Why men cannot suffer..?
Damn it, nothing has really happened, so why I keep thinking about the stupid incident. Life goes on. Never mind that have happened to so many of us, on multiple occasions. And never mind that the fault is always ours. Fuck such a sexist world.

P.S.  Don't forget to watch the vid in the beginning of this post. Very well-made short film worth your time. Peace!

Because I don't have a penis....

It is a well known fact the sexes in India are treated very differently. And it is very sad too. But what to do.
Women are housewives mainly, born to serve the husband and make him happy. Bear the children, take care of them, cook, and eat just after the man of the household had filled his stomach. To my great surprise Indian women enjoy this cohabitation. They want money only from their spouse in return for the warm home. They don't aspire for anything more than just to have a family (of course, I am generalizing).
The other day, when I couldn't bear the fucking heat in my room anymore, I laid down in front of our room. Just simply on the floor, in my clothes, in the hall , just like an Indian. Lower class Indians do it all the time. White women probably not. That is why half of the hotel came checking me out until the morning. Fuck the safety, I was too hot.
I guess Muslim women in their burqas must be boiling yet it is normal for their husbands to take off their shirts. Fucking sexism. When I went for the swim, Indians were in their clothes. All of the girls; the ones wearing a saree, and moreover also the ones in jeans, dipped into the ocean fully clothed. I've seen few guys fooling with the waves in their jeans too. However most of them went only in their longis or underwear. If I would do that I would probably get raped. So how come women wouldn't rape a guy in his underwear? Well, I would, but that is a completely different story.
Unfortunately, this is no different in the west. Only the means of sexism are different. While western women are often career minded that doesn't necessarily mean they escaped the social stigma of the sex discrimination. Magazines feed us with skinny models, media sells us beauty products which will make us slim, young, desirable. So only slim and young is desirable? According to this world, the answer is yes. However male sex symbols are men like George Clooney (because being older and white-haired is hot), Bruce Willis (because bold is sexy) or Robert Pattinson (I seriously have no clue what is sexy about him). Imagine though a women with the same features. Older than 50? What a turtle! White hair? Yak! Bold? I think I am going to puke...
If you reverse the roles, so the man would have female features- slim, young, with firm breasts and buttocks, shaved, tanned... all of this is definitely desirable and acceptable by the society. So in conclusion: men can do anything. Even pee while standing. Women are not allowed. Fucking sexist world.

You are cordially not invited

For a long time I didn't find the time to update my blog. I have been too happy, therefore nothing to write about. Do I always write only when sad? Perhaps we don't need to share our happiness as much as we need to complain about our problems.
So here I am. Married. Excited, happy, a bit scared. But I am not alone; there are two of us feeling this way. I suppose that's what the marriage is about...

The fish

Today I have tried to save a fish.

I walked on the beach with the morning sun already burning my white face, my feet in a wet sand occasionally cooled by a coming wave. As I looked down there was a green sparkle. A shiny little stirrings, a thing grasping for life, it's mouth in a constant movement, breathing hardly and eyes wide open. A tiny little shiny fish, glittering as the most precious emerald.

The two stories

I started feeling little bit better. I am not anymore annoyed with the weather, people, being too hot, not having enough breeze at noon... I calmed down and stopped over-thinking. I even eat more (okay maybe not more since it's too hot but at least my appetite is back).

Today I went to my room to take an afternoon nap. I thought I'm calm and closed my eyes. Suddenly it hit me. I saw his face and started missing him. Again.

As I write these words I got interrupted (as always... remember, in India you are never alone). An old, very dark man with dreadlocks which run down almost to the floor, approached me. My new neighbour.